Instagram is my jam right now!
I'm blowing my friends' feeds up with narcissistic photos of my badass yoga practice when we all know they just want to see pictures of my dog being cute.
So I try to keep it interesting. I filter that shit to make it artsy. I take photos in cute outfits or get a little close up shot of my cleavage for good measure. I go outside, I go to the woods, I go on bike rides and I stop, drop, and yoga wherever I am so you can ooh and aah at the beautiful Pacific Northwest backdrop that I call home.
I'm trying to make it more tolerable. I really am.
You may think it's bad now, but I'm going to Mexico in a few days! I'll be taking selfies at the beach, at the pool overlooking the beach, in my hotel room overlooking the beach, at the bar overlooking the beach and at the sushi bar of the extremely random Japanese restaurant inside the hotel that probably has a view of the beach. We are going to check out some Mayan ruins and you better believe I will be ruining that by doing a headstand somewhere really inappropriate.
There will be a selfie of me in handstand riding a dolphin. It's going to get crazy.
I'll buy some more zany yoga pants and more crazy tops so you don't get bored of my wardrobe. I'll throw in some tattoo shots for all you folk who are into that sort of thing. And you know I will throw in a shot of my butt because it's the best asset in my as(s)ana practice and because, hey, what's a good Instagram following without the creepers who are following you in hopes that you'll do a topless crow pose.
I'm going to fill your feed and ask you to please like me because my sidecrow is so damn sexy, and because sometimes I can do a handstand, and because I was basically born in a backbend so you know my wheel looks amazing.
I'm going to fill up your feed with yoga and your'e going to love it because deep down inside you know you'd rather see me in forearm stand than see photos of your grown-ass friends finally learning how to cook a decent meal.
The sun is setting and a photo opportunity awaits my friends. See you on the 'gram!